The Hana Tsun Nose Straightener is supposed to help straighten a crooked nose. Imagine turning to your true love and seeing this thing on her face. No, not happening.
Yes, you read it right. Placenta. Mix it with some henna and apparently it will repair and strengthen your damaged hair. I'll stick with the damaged hair, thank you.
I always thought a smile came naturally. But apparently I was wrong; we should be training them to make a perfectly upturned crescent.
Ok, here's the deal: if I have to put human baby foreskins on my face to keep it from aging, then I'm going to be one wrinkled up old human. You DO know where foreskins come from, right? OMG!
Eat yourself beautiful? If eating made me beautiful, I'd be all over some cream cheese donuts all day long. I have to admit I am just a bit skeptical of these collagen marshmallows.
The Kogao! Smile Lines Face Belt is touted as a device that smooths out those fine smile lines by trapping in heat while you sleep. Looks way too medieval for me.
Hourei Lift Bra is for your FACE cheeks, just in case you were wondering.
This is actually called a "Facekini". Seriously. I couldn't make this stuff up. It is supposed to protect you from harmful UV rays. So will sunscreen.
Can you guess what this is? No, it is not a pattern for female home bikini wax products. This Propia Hige Japanese Fake Beard Set was supposedly designed for men who have difficulty growing facial hair. Take another look at it. Yes, your mind goes there, too, I know it does.
Deo Perfume candy. Are you supposed to eat it or smear it behind your ear and on your wrists?
This hair treatment, found in the UK, is hyped to the public as a protein-rich way to condition your hair. Yes, you heard it right: bull semen hair conditioning treatment. My question is this: who collects the bull semen?
We're told we have to exercise everything on a regular basis, so why not exercise the lips? They're muscles, too, you know. This Mouth Exercise Face Slimmer Mouthpiece is just what you need to work up that perfectly controlled pouty lip. As long as you don't mind looking like a ridiculous clown while you're doing it.
Now this is a beauty regimen I can live with!
This contraption is supposed to be an Eyelid Trainer that gives you the Western look of "double eyelids". I thought lizards and alligators were the only creatures with double eyelids.
The main thing I want to know here is this: why? I mean, are you going to parade it around the mall for everyone to see? I hope not.
Not only do you need a corset for your waist, but you have to have one for your face, as well.